No Sammy Just Sam
by MissEdnaShamrock
Summary: Ever wonder Dean is so attached to his necklace and so hesitant to give Castiel his amulet? Spoiler for 5X02. Dean's thought's during a certain scene.


_**Title:**___**No Sammy. Just Sam.**

_**Author:**_** EdnaShamrock**

_**Summary:**___**Ever wonder Dean is so attached to his necklace and so hesitant to give Castiel his amulet? **

_**Warnings:**_** Spoiler for Season 5 Episode 2**

******

"I did come for something," Castiel said, tearing his glare from Dean after telling him what's what. "An amulet."

"An amulet?" Bobby asked, quizzically. "What kind?"

"Very rare, very powerful," Cas said, calm and more official than he was a second ago as he and Dean made more space between them both. "It burns hot in God's presence, it'll help me find him."

"Like, God EMF?" Sam asked, to which Cas nodded slightly in confirmation at Sam.

"Well, I don't know what you're talking about. I ain't got nothing' like that" Bobby told Castiel.

"I know, you don't" Castiel said. Dean turned from Bobby to Castiel, waiting for him to say who does have something like that. Castiel looked at Dean in a very hinting way and moved his eyes to Dean's chest. Dean followed his eyeline and found Castiel was looking for Dean's necklace. Dean looked back up at Castiel, uneasy.

"What, this?" Dean asked.

"May I borrow it?" Cas asked.

"No!" Dean replied, protectively.

"Dean, give it to me," Cas said, demandingly. Dean hesitated.

It was scandalous, giving Castiel his necklace. He never took it off. Ever. And there was good reason, in Dean's opinion.

He'd worn it ever since he was twelve years old, ever since Christmas Day, 1991. Not once did he take it off, despite all the things he'd been through the past 19 years since then. All the hunts, the cuts and scrapes, the hospital trips and ferocious face to face battles, not once did it leave Dean's neck.

Dean remembered first setting eyes on it. That lonely Christmas Day in that trashy motel room with only him and his brother. Dean always looked out for Sammy and tried to make his Christmas happy by getting him presents and telling him their Dad came by. But Sam was always the clever one. He'd figured out that Dean had bought him the presents. But then again, it was a little obvious after receiving a Barbie doll and a young girls tinselled baton. However, Sam got a real present. He was going to give it to their father but Sam was more thankful to his brother.

Dean could still remember the newspaper wrapping, the comics page on the outside of the present. He opened it and loved the sight of it. An amulet necklace. The amulet in the shape of a woman's face with horn's protruding from the side of her head. As weird as that all sounds, to Dean it was one of the best presents he'd ever received. He pulled it over his head straight away and was proud to wear it.

From that moment on, Dean had never taken it off. He'd never even think it. There were many problems caused because Dean refused to take it off in the past. But of course, being Dean, he didn't care.

**

_First day of being the new kid - 1994_

"_You alright, Sammy?" Dean asked, as he and his brother walked in their new school. This wasn't a first for them, of course. Only three weeks ago, they were doing the same thing. Only it was a different school._

"_Yeah," Sam said, not so convincingly._

"_Come one, Sammy" Dean said, knowing exactly what it was. "Just think, a few more years and you'll be done with this."_

_Sam didn't reply. Dean only knew too well what was racking through his mind._

_This school in particular was rather strict. Dean found that rather fast when he was sat down in his first class, a Miss Bowmont was particularly picky._

"_Young man, jewellery is against school policy." She said, accepting he was new and kindly telling him the jewellery rule._

"_Thanks for the piece of trivia, sweetheart" Dean said and he continued writing down stupid maths problems he'd gone over countless times in countless other schools._

"_Mr Winchester, please take your necklace off." Bowmont said. "It's against school rules."_

"_No" Dean said, looking up at her with a very serious look on his face. She was taken aback by his retort and revealed a little look of shock on her face._

"_Who are you to talk to me in that manner?" she said, stubbornly and strictly. Dean took no notice of the fact that she was a teacher._

"_Who are you to tell me to take of my necklace?" Dean replied. There were a few stifles of laughter among the other students in the class, all of which were now fixated on Dean and Mrs Bowmont._

"_I am a teacher, Winchester, meaning you must do as I say," she shouted. "Are you going to take it off or will I have to call your mother?"_

_Dean stood up, intimidating and taller than her. "My mom's dead."_

_Mrs Bowmont gave a frustrated sigh. "What about your father?"_

"_Good luck getting through to him" Dean said._

"_Mr Winchester, if you do not cooperate, I'll have to send you to the principles office," Bowmont threatened however Dean had been threatened even worse before in his life. She was nothing scary._

"_No, you won't, I'm leaving" Dean said, angry but not letting it show. Dean stormed his way over and out of the classroom and eventually out of the school. He didn't give a damn what he'd get for it, no way was he taking his necklace off after three years. No frigging way, man._

**

Dean looked from Castiel down to his necklace. It was virtually a limb, he'd been wearing it for so long. He'd been so attached to it, especially this past year. The fact that it was a gift from Sam made a big difference. Recently, Dean had become even more attached to it.

It was the one thing Dean had with him everywhere he went that came from a genuine Sam. His Sammy, his little brother. Everywhere he went, a little bit of Sam went with him everywhere too. He always kept this in his thoughts as his little brother meant the most to him in the world. He'd noticed with many hunts involving siblings that they weren't nothing compared to his and Sam's. Which was understandable. Dean often called Sam 'Sammy'. It still showed the little brother in Sam. The one who looked up to Dean.

Dean had known pretty much everything about Sam. He could read him like a porn magazine. And Sam was able to read Dean and they knew each other more than anyone. They spent so much of their time together. That's why when Dean had resurrected, he had to hold onto the necklace more than anything. He _did _know Sammy.

He used to know Sammy.

Nowadays, Sam wasn't Sammy. He wasn't his little brother. Instead, a demonic man in his brothers body, part vampire, poisoning the Sammy within by sucking on demon blood. Dean couldn't do anything to stop him in the past year; by the time he'd risen out of the ground…it was too late. Sammy died the moment Dean did.

He didn't recognise his brother anymore. He didn't know what to do or say around him now. Sam felt guilty as hell and all he could do other than find ways to defeat Lucifer was say sorry. And even though he did see the error in his ways, even though Ruby was dead; Sam still wasn't the same.

And Dean had to hold on to the Sammy he knew and loved. The Sammy he raised, looked after and cared for. The Sammy he nursed when he was sick and who nursed him. When they were kids, on every hunt they went on before Ruby came along, before Sam left for Stanford. And right now, all of that was a part of that necklace.

Dean looked back up at Cas and knew, deep down, he had to give it to Castiel. If God really was the one ultimate power who could defeat Lucifer, then Dean had no choice. He had to let it go. He glared at Cas, "Alright I guess."

Dean grabbed it and lifted the thick, black string above his head. It felt sinful to take it off. He held the necklace in his hands, feeling the details of the face among his fingers. He looked at Castiel, questioningly and held the necklace high. "_Don't _lose it," he threatened, his voice deep and commanding. He let Castiel take the amulet as he gave him a subtle thanking look. "Great. Now I feel naked," Dean commented, unappreciatively.

"I'll be in touch" Cas said softly, just over a whisper. Dean rudely smiled and not giving Castiel the kindest of looks. He turned his head away for a second, adjusting to the fact he'd just taken of his precious necklace. When he turned back, Castiel was gone. The necklace was gone. And with that necklace, the last of Sammy had gone. With a stranger in his brothers form behind him.

The last bit of his little brother he had, the last bit of Sammy Dean had held onto so dearly, was now gone. He had none of his little brother left now. None of his Sammy.

No Sammy. Just Sam.

**Ok, I hope that wasn't too cheesy or anything! But I just had an urge to write Dean's reason for being so attached to the necklace, whether it was intended on the show or not. Please R&R. I'm fairly surprised I've managed to write so much, normally I suck at these kinda things!**


End file.
